99% fat-free lies

I admit, I used to think '99% fat free' meant the food will give us free fat - being as a kid, anything I got for free thrilled me. Little did I know, food companies were actually targeting the 'fear of fat' mentality which was completely contrary to my prior interpretation.

But my childhood idiocy cannot possibly live up to the gullible attempts made by grown adult marketers to make their food look slightly healthier. We've all seen them before; we vigorously search the supermarket aisles looking for our favourite candy only to find that your sought-out product was in front of your face the whole time - it just had a big fat star logo slapped onto its label desperately making the claim 'NOW 99% FAT FREE'. I don't know about you, but I am almost certain they didn't pay extra for a cheap liposuction on their fat-filled food and then measure its fat content so they can validate their 99% fat-free claim; and if this was true claim, why stop at 99%? Maybe they wanted to leave a bit of fat for good luck?

Their futile efforts of trying to suck up to the modern social trend towards healthier lifestyles have done nothing but mislead and annoy consumers.

The food producers had the choice of sticking their chests up high, proud of their delicious sugary, carbohydrate-packed unhealthy truth; or underhandedly deceive consumers only to end up at the bottom of the food chain of health fanatics. Low-fat food is a great ideal, food with low fat, sugar and artificial content is something to be sought out for when shopping. But I despise nothing more than to see chocolate producers pathetically try to mesmerise us with a plainly transparent lie about their fat content.